stormyhotwolf88

I seriously just don't post much about my life anymore.. it's too bad.. I know many people haven't really seen me since I've been cooped up at home since graduation.. I'll try to keep it to talking points:

1. My grandmother died 12/26/09 of cancer.
2. My Aunt died that I barely knew anyway on 1/1/10 of a heart attack 20 minutes after the ball dropped.
3. Azure's Dad died late Febuary/ early March of blood clot.
4. I got a job working for Bunko studios and so quit Target in June. I did backgrounds for MAD on Cartoon Network.
5. Bunko wasn't paid by Warner Brothers in August since we lost two episodes to work on for that month and so everyone was laid off. I worked again for another week in September, but that was it.
6. Spent a month sending out resumes by e-mail, got no response so November I tried to see what my contacts were saying...
7. Currently working from home on two projects.
8. My cousin's Mother died of diabetes 12/1/10 and my family adopted my little cousin so now we are a family of 5. My family is currently building his new furniture.
9. I'm addicted to World of Warcraft and my main is a lvl 63 Draenei Enhancement Shamen named Anastasiadi on Boulderfist. I just made a Troll on Obsidian's server.
10. I'm trying to move to the city so that I can find any kind of job there. I'll probably find out more about it tomorrow.
11. I'm probably going to get to help my Dad pick out a jury in a week or two.

And that was my year in a nutshell.

Wolf of Azure (10:31:09 PM): You know what I need to add to my pants? >.>
StormyHotWolf88 (10:31:26 PM): my mouth?
Wolf of Azure (10:31:33 PM): You know when you start a section in Viewtiful Joe the game has the nice sound effect "GO FOR IT!"?
Wolf of Azure (10:31:42 PM): Yes, but I want that UNDER my pants.
StormyHotWolf88 (10:31:45 PM): no XD
StormyHotWolf88 (10:31:58 PM): I never played viewtiful joe
Wolf of Azure (10:32:10 PM): Oh, well anyway. I was thinking, adding a small speaker in the button. When you unclasp the button this sound effect plays screaming "GO FOR IT"
Wolf of Azure (10:32:28 PM): It'd be awesome next time you'd undo them. <.<
StormyHotWolf88 (10:33:03 PM): ......
StormyHotWolf88 (10:33:08 PM): Azure
StormyHotWolf88 (10:33:25 PM): that would cause me to buy the next ticket back to nyc
Wolf of Azure (10:33:45 PM): But you'd laugh the entire way!
Wolf of Azure (10:33:54 PM): Oh come on! It'
StormyHotWolf88 (10:33:57 PM): XD
Wolf of Azure (10:34:02 PM): It'd be HILARIOUS.
Wolf of Azure (10:34:20 PM): It'd also make me feel more manly going to the bathroom.
StormyHotWolf88 (10:34:22 PM): ur crazy XD
Wolf of Azure (10:34:34 PM): *Unbutton.* "JUST GO FOR IT!" *Awww yeahs and pisses.*
StormyHotWolf88 (10:34:40 PM): LOL
Wolf of Azure (10:34:55 PM): Then when it zips back up, get the sound effect when you get Viewtiful rating.
Wolf of Azure (10:35:00 PM): "You were Amazing!"
Wolf of Azure (10:35:17 PM): Holy shit that would sell like hot-cakes. o.o
Wolf of Azure (10:35:40 PM): Think of the ego-booster guys would get putting their pants back on after banging a really hot chick!
StormyHotWolf88 (10:36:14 PM): ::sweatdrop::..
StormyHotWolf88 (10:36:25 PM): Azure..
StormyHotWolf88 (10:36:33 PM): can I post this to my journal? XD
Wolf of Azure (10:36:52 PM): Alright, before anything else. Think of the chorus that would go on within sleezy motels.
StormyHotWolf88 (10:37:06 PM): O_o;
Wolf of Azure (10:37:07 PM): The morning after everyone getting woken up, a wave if you will, of "You were Amazing!"
StormyHotWolf88 (10:37:15 PM): LOL

(7:42:55 PM) Greg: So the sound effect for removing someones pants when trying to rape them would be the voice of Phoenix Wright screaming "Objection~!"
(7:43:15 PM) Azure: YES! That's what happens when they get ripped off!
(7:43:21 PM) Greg: yup
(7:43:38 PM) Azure: Then if the other person has a similar model, their's screams the Von Karma "Objection.{"

http://www.ustream.tv/channel/stormyhotwolf88

Unfortunately, Photoshop crashed on me and I lost almost the entire picture when I was almost done. So I'm a bit too distraught to draw anymore atm.

So since I had gotten this Ustream account I PLAN TO USE IT :D. If anyone wants to watch me do a commission tomorrow, I get home about 1:30pm from class so I decided that I should start the stream about 2:00pm EST. The stream most likely will be for quite a while so if you get home about 5, I should still be working on it. It'll be fun, and I hope to converse with who ever shows up. the URL is http://www.ustream.tv/channel/stormyhotwolf88

because I don't draw explicate things, there is no password. I'll post again on dA, FA, and Lj few minutes before I'm starting.

So I've been going out with a pretty odd Sag boy. I hear they are known for not able to commit to anything. Being a cancer, that can be a problem since we are like, COMMIT TO ME! MARRY ME!!! and all that jazz. I know because I've been talking about marriage since month 2. I have Cancer in my Venus as well as my Sun and Mercury so I'm a pretty strong emotional being and can't deal with short term relationships. (we've been going for 2.7 years)

Before we started going out, I did check the horoscopes on how to deal with him to make him happy. I had the intent to get him wrapped around my finger. Somewhat control and not want to leave me. Why? cause I'm female and I'm insecure LOL. I thought this would be a challenge because of him being a Sag. He was the first Sag I've dealt with as I had a long string of Gemini boys (each as bi polar and neurotic as the next) and one Aquarius (Was selfish and wanted my attention ALL the time and fought with ALL the time). (most of my relationships last for a year or two)

I started with caution, not sure if he was going to do anything against me. I couldn't figure him out and yet he was too good to be true. When I first met him, both away from home, hundreds of miles away, he was really really quiet. Almost Unemotional and he always had this furrow look that intimidated the weak heart-ed. I immediately went to work to get him to talk to me using my Gemini girlish charm that makes most guys respond to my command. I'm an Aquarius rising if no one knew X3. Anyway, the conversation got deep. He started with, "Do you believe that relationships were just about sex?" and I looked at him like he was weird and said "No" He nearly jumped out of his skin in excitement and I felt that I might have something good on my hands. So we started talking about sex and I found he was a virgin and never had a girl before and I'm thinking, oh boy I could rock this guy... The next night I believe away from home, We were at a massive comedy show and he was holding me close, I noticed his body was saying he was attracted to me. And I looked up at him and he looked at me and the tension to kiss roused up. I thought to myself, if he kisses me he's like all the other guys I dealt with. He then stopped and looked at me, guilt came over him and he turned away . I smiled thinking.. whoa, he respects me. He later said that: yeah he respected me and also realized that he had just met me. I knew I had to pursue him which I NEVER do.

Almost Unemotional and he always had this furrow look that intimidated the weak heart-ed. Getting to know him, he's pretty crazy and spontaneous as I was. I mean, I'm very good at distracting people XD. He would tell stories of the dumb shit he use to do when he was a child like running into walls and how popular he was until he became isolated in private middle school.

Though what puzzles me is the commitment bit. In the years that we've been together, He's done absolutely nothing wrong! Am I just pessimistic and bitter about all my last guys? Comparing to him and realize he's the best thing since sliced bread??? I'm his technical first girl, I took his virginity and hell, I taught him about swinging and I tried to test him out and see his reaction to other girls. Both girls, he could not get the means to screw either. I was flattered that he could only get it up for me but my attempt to flesh out any hidden characteristics have failed o.o. I mean I seriously landed THE ABSOLUTE PERFECT GUY. I'm ecstatic and finally feel like I can let myself go and become just as obsessed as he is to me.

He could tell you everything he loves about me and knows my layers like no one else. Perhaps I do this because I don't trust myself?

to further my point, He's super romantic. I mean he never misses the chance to open the car door for me, I gave up on paying for myself because he's quick at getting his wallet out first, He loves taking me out on dates, he's a beast in bed, He's taken me to Rome, he took me ballroom dancing and we've explored our relationship in ways that many our age are too immature to do together. We love co-op games that require a lot of communication and challenge each other in some games. He loves the fire I have behind me and I love his cool nature, quick wit and reliability. He makes my heart flutter with random text messages of poetry. I can't resist him. I can't. but why do I hold myself to do so? What's holding me back???

He's Sag rising, Sag sun, cancer moon, sag mer, scorpio venus, pisces mars

Have you ever woke up and thought that you were nothing too special? Everyone seems to have some kind of imbalance that places them apart from others. They think of crazy things that you could never even imagine.. or even tried to. You are too balanced... strong minded enough that no one needs to care for you. You take great pride in your Independence... but even with what you know, you are stuck in a situation... waiting for time to finish toying with you. Yet, with these strong qualities, passion doesn't grab on to you. Nothing that one would claim genius. You are just as good as the next person. You know where you stand. You wish to be the brightest, most aspiring in your field. Whether it's in the lights or in a cubicle. You are pretty, nicked named Gorgeous by your lover... but you know you are not the kind that society dreams of. You come to terms..

There is always someone better then you.

Yet the angels protect you. Why would they?

I wonder.

My own presence has changed the face of my family. both good and bad.. My grandfather quit drinking so he could be around me more. My Auntie Jackie clung onto life as long as she could to see my cousin and I grow. My sick Aunt Cathy began to speak again because she wanted to hold me.

I then escape certain death, with a voice telling me it wasn't my time before I went under. Tell me why I'm special enough to be protected? I largely don't believe in God. Yet his/her name escapes my lips more lately. Have I realized something that most have not? I'm a meant to do something that could potentially alter history?

And then to tell me that Azure is my gift from God. What am I to think? procreation? Unless there was more to that that I'm missing besides the emotional letting him into my heart.

Plain and simple.. That is all life needs to be.

I wonder how life would have been living in a small tribe of people. Human culture had created a bubble where the thought of living in your own skin is unnatural. Everything should be synthetic, to the lips on your face to the boobs on your chest.

Copyright, Pop Art, hip Hop. Infringement at it's core. stealing ideas. Concepts of new, are only remixes of old. Does no one know the difference between parody and down right stealing of ideas?

Numa Numa- Taken
Work it Harder- Taken
Fire and Ice- Taken
Technologic- Taken

I hate Pop Art. Andy Warhol died about 5 months from my birth. Maybe he knew I was coming. He was afraid of the hospital.

So was Eric.

The shadows that followed where ever he went. A vortex of Misery and Drama surrounded him and engulfed those he touch. But I am protected from him. He taints me and then it flows away.

bad things happen when your hands are idle...

I am bad. I get bored. I am incapable to destroy others. But I can sabotage myself.

I could kill him.

but I can't.

I wish I could do more damage to my potential killer.

Who did Eric kill? My heart.

Cold? yes. I can be. But why do I listen to commands like a dog.

A puppet I feel. Mans ultimate toy to ravish to his liking. Toyed with a fucking SOCK. I could tear him a new one.

but all the blood drained away. Nothing left by a small will to survive... Body not responding well. Thinking the best way out. No one could save me. No one could hear me. Teeth aren't sharp enough to go though thick cloth.

I'm not ok. I just want to know... why am I here? Is it only because I hope to have a life with Azure.. Suddenly I have a question that my own sub conscious can't answer..


Honestly, I have no idea what my brain just typed out LOL

yeah.. today is a shut down day. I feel like shit. My private life is shaken up, and money is an issue but I start my work study soon. I'm glad that my work study is trying to get my papers along as fast as I want to and I should be starting that job real soon. Hooray to 117 a week.

But I'm also bummed because yesterday and the day before I've been cleaning out my PC to make room for the updates for photoshop and After Effects. Photoshop updates fine on both computers but then when I try to update AE on the PC, I can't because it requires a minimum of 1G of RAM. My PC has a half a gig of RAM and the ma>

lol I know that I don't have many friends on LJ since I'm not that active lol. I do use LJ mostly for community posting lol.

alright, I've noticed a lot of spam coming from this one site called www.myhotnewcrush.com and its gettign on my nerves. I don't know if I had gotten e-mails but I've gotten them on DeviantArt, seen them around youtube and now I'm getting Bots over AIM IMing me directly to my well known account. If it was only one time, I'd shrug it off but I've left my computer on for a weekend and had 8 seperate screen names IM with "Oh someone has a crush on you!" just this morning I woke up with two more. I keep waking up to like 2 or 3 each day. I'm getting pissed off. It's obviously a scam site because it's a one pager without any good webcoding apparent or even a demo of what they do.

And god forbid they are using screen names that belong to people like what use to happen on MSN when there were attempts to spread harmless and harmful virus'. These people could very well lose their screen names and if they are and if they are bots, that's a helleva lotta screen names being wasted that other people could have used. i hope each of those screen names get erased and available to the public -.-

God.

Life is stressful.

I decided I don't wanna be an adult ¬.¬

6.6;.. but I know that isn't going to happen cause I screamed this when I got my first period... oh 9-10 years ago and my call still hasn't been answered..... fucking angels, fucking growth hormones

O_o; i thought the giraffe from toys r us had like some kinda anti-adult beam or something where if you chant it like bloody mary good things happen oppose to chanting bloody mary before a show and someone throws an egg into the talent show...

my fucking ride is coming to an end and it starts with my 21st birthday. The day I've been waiting for since I hit 18 and realized they jipped me.... but I also realize that 21 is a jip too.

I went drinking last weekend and threw up my dinner violently and now my eyes are bloody (my left eye is filled with blood up to half of my iris) for the next two weeks. doc said i just busted some capillaries so it should heal.. yeah 21 -.-

-.- usually I'm better with drinks but that drink knocked me on my ass..

damn I'm cursing... Because I'm hot even though my air conditioner is on. If I was speaking, my New York accent would be coming through too. The slow tough one.

Sexuality is another thing. From what my friends tell me, Ganador changed me. I'm not entirely too sure to the extent I've changed to them. It's a little disheartening when I see my gay friends especially getting to sleep around with much regard to their bodies because I'M not allowed to do so for a couple reasons. Just because females get the label of slut doesn't mean I can't label some men too of the same -.- I'm sick of hearing certain guys sleeping and cheating around, over and over and over again!

Though putting that off to the side... Why can't I just be friends first to guys? Why do they have to feel me up to see if i'd fuck them or not??? damnit, I got fucking molested on the dance floor by an italian in rome! WTF >I</i> don't get? Supposedly, I'm pretty to other people, but I just don't have the desire to: always look nice, take care of my hair (which still confuses me), break my ankles to walk in high heels... I'll dress up for occasions because those are the times I want to stand out but.. sometimes I just like to blend in... besides.. I like it when my boyfriend's jaw drops when I dress up for him.. If i do it on a daily basis, then he'll get bored lol.. I guess I just can't do the popular thing, nor do I think I want to.

Like, i have friends that are kinda popular... but when i have them over or something it's like.. what do you want to do? Since I find out that they don't like video games and looks at you as if you got 2 heads O_o;... that's embarrassing and makes me feel like a nerd. Does growing up mean forgetting about imaginations of other worlds, Throwing away that stuffed animal that makes a nice decor on your bed? then devoting all our time about talking about petty drama and getting into other people's lives... I mean wtf is with Drama on TV news of OMG BRITNEY WAS SEEN WITH PARIS! just wtf..

My mom is a great example. She's turned fashion into a competition with her peers at work. WTF. >.< WHHYYY...

Am I a tom boy or something?? IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME THAT I DON'T GET IT.

Speaking of stuffed animals. Most of mine are in the attic because I have/had asthma and they didn't want the dust from their fur getting to me. I've only managed to keep....::counts:: 6 and 4 are from within the last 3-4 years. The Doberman is 6 years old and was given to me by an old crush who also gave me the inspiration necklace you all may have seen. If i ever sleep with a stuffed animal (usually when I'm missing Azure and need to hold somebody) it's usually him because of how big and soft he is... but he can't replace my boyfriend. The Raccoon is 15 years old. He has ALWAYS been my favorite stuffed animal.. and yeah hes been on the floor a lot.. but hes always somewhere near by. I haven't played with him over the years but to hell if I'm ever giving him up. He's like.. my most sacred possession and there are just somethings I don't want to let go.. yeah.. most of the stuffed animals in my room have stories..

I wonder how many I do have in the attic... I think I have a neon colored cow up there.

::sighs:: I'm tired... So I'm going to go finish reading... see ya..